William The Coroner’s Forensic Files

Tuesday, 17, May, 2011

Sales Call.

Filed under: People who need pianos dropped on them — williamthecoroner @ 17:57

Just because you SAY “this is not a sales call”, that doesn’t magically make it not a sales call, particularly when you then attempt to sell me something during the call.

Yes, there IS a need to use that language.

I really don’t happen to care if it offends you.

Since you called me, I’ll respond in any way I see fit.

If you wish to make a living, there are lots of things you can do.  Have you considered pimping?

If I give you my Social Security Number you’ll take my name off your list?  How nice.

You’ll just have to keep calling?  OK.


  1. Digital answering machine with caller ID set to two rings (to make sure they get charged) is the way to go.

    Comment by Bad Science — Tuesday, 17, May, 2011 @ 18:08 | Reply

  2. If it was a sales call under the guise of a survey, it’s a crime. (Friend of mine was a poll stalker at the mall while in college. He explained it to me.)

    If a telemarketer does sucker me into answering, I find that laying the phone handset down and walking away until the “hang up the darned phone!” alarm starts playing is effective. It keeps them tied up a little longer than just hanging up, so they can annoy fewer people in a shift.

    A guy I used to work with got calls at work from the New York Times trying to get him to subscribe. He’d start off with “why would I want to take that left-wing propaganda rag?” and keep arguing until the marketer hung up. He kept score – he was up to eight by the time I left the company.

    Comment by Dave H — Wednesday, 18, May, 2011 @ 08:51 | Reply

  3. Take you ear from the receiver, and utilize a police whistle, loud and long.
    Then hang up.

    Comment by guffaw — Wednesday, 18, May, 2011 @ 12:42 | Reply

    • Yeah, but the phone is limited to 90 dB output. Speaking gibberish is more fun.

      Comment by williamthecoroner — Wednesday, 18, May, 2011 @ 15:06

  4. “Yes, there IS a need to use that language.”

    My father-in-law used to make a game of seeing how long he could keep telemarketers on hold. Occasionally he’d come back to the phone to say “hang on, we’re trying to find him”. I think his record was about 20 minutes….

    Comment by randompawses — Friday, 20, May, 2011 @ 17:30 | Reply

  5. Could the piano be on fire?

    Comment by rethoryke — Saturday, 21, May, 2011 @ 08:09 | Reply

  6. A local paper called me repeatedly and I repeatedly told them no thankyoustopcallingme. Finally, some poor, innocent young thing called and was left speechless when I said I’d be glad to subscribe if it was available in Braille. They never called me again.

    Comment by KA9VSZ — Sunday, 29, May, 2011 @ 19:42 | Reply

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