William The Coroner’s Forensic Files

Sunday, 13, September, 2009

Sir Isaac, You Magnificent Bastard

Filed under: Self mockery — williamthecoroner @ 20:53

isaac_newton So there I was, at the Honey Hut, waiting for a small turtle sundae.  Their combination of salty pecans, sweet hot fudge and caramel, silky vanilla ice cream is well worth the calories.  They have a dedicated clientel.  They also have a wide variety of sizes.  While I can eat a large sundae, it is wiser for me to share a small one.  I don’t have the metabolism of a teenager anymore.

Teenagers, now, that’s who works there.  This season their counter help is young and male.  Mine made the sundae with a flair, and he also served it to me with a flare, putting it down on the counter and pushing it toward me with a flourish.  This is where Isaac came into play again, as an object in motion wants to remain in motion.  His hand stopped the cup, but the mass of whipped cream went flying off, straight onto my trousers.  Right on the zipper.

Now, the first rule of forensic pathology is one should never wear anything that isn’t machine washable.  So that’s not a problem.  My companion, though, thought it was a laff riot.  The sundae was rebuilt, with significantly less whipped cream.  The girls from last year were a lot more careful.


  1. Wm! You actually have a tag for “self-mockery”! How very… Hmm. Modest? At least you only flirted with Newton’s laws of *motion*. There was potential for some heavy gravitational experience! And listen, while it is wonderfully wise to share a small sundae, it is perfectly sage to split a large, and go for the Happy Medium.

    Comment by Bianca Castafiore — Sunday, 13, September, 2009 @ 23:02 | Reply

  2. And hopefully it was FREE! 🙂

    Comment by Old NFO — Monday, 14, September, 2009 @ 21:23 | Reply

  3. u r so awesome isaac newton i love your work the newtons laws cool

    Comment by marquisha brookx — Saturday, 5, December, 2009 @ 16:29 | Reply

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