William The Coroner’s Forensic Files

Saturday, 21, February, 2009

Big Egg Sucks Egg

Filed under: Food and Drink — williamthecoroner @ 15:56

medium_big_eggThe news was out, the Big Egg was re-opening.  Once the place to go break your diet at 0300–or whenever you had a craving for greasy diner food, it had been closed by the Health Department for unspecified code violations several years ago.  Then it was cleaned up (obviously and thoroughly) and did a stint as an Asian restaurant (Chinese and Vietnamese) which wasn’t half bad, really.

But they closed and there was a dearth of late-night greasy spoons.  Particularly if you try to avoid the national chains, as is my wont, unless I’m desperate for a bathroom.  So I was pleased to hear that they were re-opening under new management.  Breakfast out is one of life’s little (and inexpensive) luxuries.

So I went there this morning, bypassing my beloved Big Al’s, but I’ve been going to Big Al’s so much I all I have to say is “The usual” or “The regular” (which are two different things) and I get them.  As variety is the spice of life, Shay’s does a decent breakfast, as does the Diner on E55th St. Directly downtown, the Superior Restaurant is always hopping.  George’s Kitchen is taking care of the Westside.  I learned about all of these places from the Cleveland Police Homicide Squad.  These guys are serious about their food.

So, I was primed and ready to enjoy the Big Egg.  Yes, it was clean.  Yes, it was well-lit.  Yes, they had the egg-shaped menus.  But (and you knew that was coming didn’t you):

  1. The coffee tasted like cardboard
  2. The gyro and cheese omlette came without gyro meat
  3. There was no butter for the silver-dollar pancakes
  4. The silver dollar pancakes were rubbery
  5. The hash browns tasted like they were made of a different kind of cardboard
  6. The side of sausages that were to come with the silver-dollar pancakes didn’t appear.

If it werent’ for nostalgia, 9which isn’t what it used to be either), the breakfast would have been a total loss.  Anyone can have a bad day.  I’m very disappointed though.  These folks are differently clued, and Big Al will keep getting my money.


  1. From what I hear, Big Al’s is hard to beat. Breakfast here was cold soba noodles with a spicy sauce and tea.

    Comment by Brigid — Saturday, 21, February, 2009 @ 16:38 | Reply

  2. Thanks for the review. I too will be sticking with Big Al’s!

    Comment by Matt — Saturday, 21, February, 2009 @ 23:53 | Reply

  3. A number of years ago, I had a job that required a lot of windshield time. On a moments notice, I would be off to anywhere in a six state area mostly unserviced by scheduled airline. I kept a notebook of all the mom ‘n pop diners, their location, hours, specialties, names of the owners and waitresses. You’d be surprised at the quality of service if you greet the waitress by name.

    From time to time, I’ll get out my notebook and take off for a drive. Some are no longer open. But—many are and still up to the quality of past times. One of my favorites is a little restaurant in St. James, Missouri run by some Amish ladies. The food is unbelievable. Apple dumplings are the specialty.

    Comment by Crucis — Sunday, 22, February, 2009 @ 22:08 | Reply

    • Yeah. There’s a truck stop in Buckhorn PA that has food that is out of this world. Looks like a dump, but inside?

      Comment by williamthecoroner — Sunday, 22, February, 2009 @ 22:27

  4. Hole in the wall diners/restaurants… sigh… Some of the best food I’ve ever had! And yeah, nothing beats breakfast at 0300 to sober one up 🙂 Not that I would know anything about that…

    Comment by Old NFO — Monday, 23, February, 2009 @ 03:00 | Reply

  5. What about Tommy’s? Perhaps there isn’t as much grease, but the breakfast is pretty delightful.


    I love those random, crazy nights when you stay up for hours working on a crafty project, watching a movie-thon (my last was Godfather mania, or was it the release of Indiana Jones trilogy?), or manically staying awake in the excitement of the start of a much needed vacation (as if you ingested 1/2 bottle of ritalin)………………followed by someone’s smart suggestion to go out for a stack of pancakes or savory slices of french toast.

    The disappointment (brought on by age and experience) lies in my awareness of being able to create the best ‘feasts’ with my own hands. Most times, I am discouraged from eating out, because I can inexpensively create a phenomenal, delightful brunch with the best ingredients…in my kitchen.

    Comment by Papyrus — Tuesday, 24, February, 2009 @ 16:45 | Reply

  6. Yes, Papyrus, but there’s nothing like somebody bringing you food. It’s a guy thing, I guess. You wouldn’t understand.

    Comment by williamthecoroner — Tuesday, 24, February, 2009 @ 17:11 | Reply

  7. I hear you. You know what would be great (?); if the cafeteria would replace the pizza bar (now and then) and make brunch in its place. The last few times there, I left with no lunch–choosing to fight the afternoon with coffee and a horribly dry scone from the Starbucks stand. It’s the same thing every day.

    Next time around, I’ll bring you some homemade banana bread………..It’s a female thing, to bring “guys” food (so we can have the fun of making it, and not all of the consumption)

    Comment by Papyrus — Tuesday, 24, February, 2009 @ 21:47 | Reply

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