William The Coroner’s Forensic Files

Thursday, 1, January, 2009

You Say You Want A Resolution

Filed under: Japery,Social Commentary — williamthecoroner @ 15:17

You say you want a resolution
Well you know
We all want to change ourselves
You tell me that it’s futile
Well you know
We all want to change ourselves
But when you talk about your pants size
Don’t you see the glaze in my eyes
Don’t you know it’s gonna be alright
Alright Alright

You say you’re gonna work out
Well you know
We’ll see how long that lasts
You say you’re gonna give up smoking
Well you know
You’re gonna stand outside and gasp.
All of the resolutions and good plans I hear,
You know I heard them all from you last year
Don’t you know it’s gonna be alright
Alright Alright

You say you’ll change your constitution
Well you know
You’ve got great plans in your head
You tell me it’s an institution
Well you know
Tomorrow you’ve got to get out of bed
But if you go around quoting Dr. Phil
Ain’t gonna do nothing but make me ill.
Don’t you know know it’s gonna be alright
Alright Alright

With apologies to Lennon and McCartney

Personal improvement is an ongoing task. I think LabRat has a point, that reflection is useful, and it is also good to determine how much effort you’re going to expend to get to where you want to go. Some goals take time, some goals take practice, some goals take breaking habits of a lifetime.

I’m not going to enumerate my resolutions, there’s only one thing more boring that another person’s self-improvement project and that’s another person’s heath problems. People don’t care. Advanced statistics is riveting when compared to other people’s self improvement projects.

It is good to think about the amount of time one wastes. There are plenty of time-sinks. I found that not watching television in the evenings has freed up about two wasted hours and I’m a much better knitter and my coloured pencil work has improved.



  1. But are you coloring INSIDE or outside the lines???? 🙂

    Comment by Old NFO — Thursday, 1, January, 2009 @ 17:57 | Reply

  2. Hey, Advanced Statistics is pure fascination, TYVM.

    Comment by Angry Professor — Thursday, 1, January, 2009 @ 19:47 | Reply

  3. I think sometimes it is quite beneficial to discuss resolutions out loud sometimes (not in excess of course). It solidifies the fact that you are human; we all have our own demons to deal with. Perfection within humans is a delusion. I find it is the differences amongst people that truly makes them interesting, amusing, and magnetic. Happy New Year to you; may 2009 be an invigorating and accomplishing year for you.

    Comment by Papyrus — Thursday, 1, January, 2009 @ 23:20 | Reply

  4. I look at resolutions the way I looked at giving up smoking.

    Long ago, in a lifetime far, far away, I smoked a pack a day. It seemed to be mostly at work and under stress, so maybe I was not truly addicted. I can’t say. What I do know…. one day as I was leaving work I began coughing. It was just as I was about to light a cigarette. I looked at the pack, thought about how STUPID I was, and tossed them in the trash. That was the last time I smoked a cigarette. That was almost thirty years ago.

    Why ‘give up smoking tomorrow’ when all I had to do was throw them away and not do it anymore? Just self control…. and a desire to be healthier and less stupid at the same time.

    To me, resolutions are like that. If they are truly worth following, they are worth doing NOW… and a new year has nothing to do with it.

    I made some serious and drastic changes in my life this past year, and will again this year. Not resolutions….. just an effort to be less stupid.
    Life is too good to waste.

    Comment by Carteach0 — Friday, 2, January, 2009 @ 09:57 | Reply

  5. When do we get to see pictures of your improved knitting? Any knitting?

    Comment by LisaK — Friday, 2, January, 2009 @ 12:32 | Reply

  6. Lisa–When you fix my digital camera.

    Comment by williamthecoroner — Friday, 2, January, 2009 @ 15:10 | Reply

  7. Did not know you knew how to knit. When did you start?

    BTW, not knowing what is wrong with the digital camera, it is usually cheaper to buy a new one then get it fixed, especially if it is the point-and-shoot type.

    Comment by Katie — Friday, 2, January, 2009 @ 15:25 | Reply

  8. Katie
    It doesn’t take photos. Just blurry smears. It looks like it needs new batteries, but the new batteries don’t help. Sure. I’d love a new digital camera. A Lumix FX100K would be perfect. Thank you.

    Comment by williamthecoroner — Friday, 2, January, 2009 @ 15:51 | Reply

  9. You KNIT????

    Comment by Miz Minka — Saturday, 3, January, 2009 @ 01:22 | Reply

  10. Minka–Sew what?

    Comment by williamthecoroner — Saturday, 3, January, 2009 @ 11:37 | Reply

  11. Sew what? Sew: I didn’t think you could possibly be any more “übercool.” I was mistaken!

    Wood/bamboo needles or metal? Socks? Sweaters? Hats? Fingerless gloves? Dish cloths? Coroner’s masks? Colorwork/Fair Isle? Cables? Brains or coral reefs? Tea cozies? Gun cozies?

    Comment by Miz Minka — Sunday, 4, January, 2009 @ 15:32 | Reply

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